Friday, July 01, 2005


Congratulations to my best friend Jennifer Smalley for getting engaged and not telling me for two weeks. Not only is this great news because I will have a party to crash in May at which I will be able to drink for free and hit on her little sister, but also because my little Jenny is growing up. I can't picture most of my friends from long long ago tying any knots or making any babies, but I guess the time has to come eventually. Change is funny though, because pretty soon you are talking about "what are we going to name our babies?" and "how are we ever going to be able to afford to retire?" and you don't even realize it. So maybe the phone call last night will have some lasting effects in regards to my "living on the edge" and "damning the man" but mostly The Wife has already stripped me of my forbidden pleasures. The only thing I have left, really, is running up to her right after I've washed my hands and screaming "Oh my god! I peed allll over myself!" and rubbing them all over her. Jesus that never gets old.

Also last night I really did almost pee all over myself when Little Ms. Engaged told me her fiance's last name. One guess.

Fucking. Lopez.

Ideas for wedding presents are already bombarding my sick head.


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