Monday, May 07, 2007

Quitting: Part 1

First try: Received patches in the mail on Thursday night. Didn't smoke Thursday evening after I got home from work. The state sent me 14 days worth of "Step 1" patches, which are 21mg / day. That's the equivilent of 21 cigarettes a day, and I haven't smoked that much since high school. Friday morning at about 8:30 I cut the patch in half (against the advice of some posts on, though the posts were five years old and there's even a mention of cutting patches in the Paper of Record if you Google hard enough) and stuck it on my shoulder. This is when I would usually have my first cigarette.

I almost immediately became noticably jumpy and had difficulty concentrating. It reminded me a lot of being on Wellbutrin (which is why I stopped taking the Wellbutrin, even though the side effects were great). No itching or redness. I couldn't tell if it was working because, honestly, I make it through the day at work without a cigarette about 50% of the time anyway. Friday after work I went home and had a few glasses of wine. I decided to go out when the Wife never came home after "happy hour" turned into eating dinner without me. I was angry (and probably kind of drunk) so I pulled my shirt off on 2nd Ave and ripped the patch off, went to Duane Reade, and bought a fresh pack of Parliments. Went to see a friend's band play with some people, got drunker, smoked lots, passed out.

Saturday I decided to quit quitting because it was Cinco de Mayo and Kentucky Derby day. Obvs. Went out with some friends. Wound up at their place, where we could smoke inside. Got home at o'God-thirty in the morning with the sunrise, smelling like your Uncle Charlie's Chevy Camaro.

Sunday I was hungover and I didn't move all day. I don't usually smoke when I'm hungover anyway. At about 9:30PM I started wanting one real bad so I took out the other half of Friday's patch and stuck it on my butt. It started itching really badly and I tried to scratch on the patch, but it didn't work and it seriously felt like there were ants under there or something so I took it off and scratched for, like, an hour. I tried to put it back on but the sticky was gone so I got out another one and put it on my upper arm. No itching. Will not put patches on my butt anymore.

Monday morning the jitteryness is not as pronounced, maybe because this one is going on 12 hours? I did, as the label warns, have crazy dreams all night. I was kind of looking forward to that part (though the label warns that if "nightmares" are too strong you can take the patch off at night) and was not disappointed. One of my coworkers just asked me if I had allergies, though, because I looked tired. Will use tons of Nivea under-eye moisturizer tomorrow morning . My mouth is really dry and I will have to stop drinking Coke in the morning because the caffine isn't helping anything. I brought cigarettes with me to work this morning because it makes me feel better knowing that they are there, but I have no desire to smoke.

I will continue updating. This will either last a month (when I run out of patches), or until Friday when I start drinking again. Stay tuned for the thrilling conclusion!


Anonymous RiSE said...

5:58 PM  

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